the previous post was too long.
thus, i decided to have a second post.
i seem really enthusiatic about blogging after changing this beautiful skin. (:
many people or rather friends of mine had said im silly.
because every day after school, i stay back in sch to accompany say lee, like charmaine said, to wait for her "stead", and i ended up being alone and go back alone.
i replied, its okay la. what's friends for?
still, they kept saying i was being silly.
well, i can actually tell myself, when im with say lee, i can take it as shes accompanying me as well.
so i would feel alright. but rather true right?
but i do admit, at times i feel a little sad.
because it seems as though im just there to be with her, only to see her going home with benson.
well, at least i have found daugther to go back with me after her SSP. (:
although staying back in sch till five plus makes me very tired, i get to spend time with say lee and maybe my other close friends in sch sometimes.
but today wasnt good.
say lee wanted to go to the toilet, daughter wanted to play piano. (very very eager to.)
since it was the "seventh month", say lee was afraid.
thus i persuaded daughter to go with me to accompany say lee.
although she was having SSP at 2.45, which was 2.31 at that time.
we managed to play for a while, while say lee went to buy drinks.
she stood behind watching us play.
soon after, benson and friends came.
daughter had to go already.
say lee mumbled something like, "i pei ta dao san dian."
i was looking at something else, and replied her a very blur and soft huh.
she said, "mei you" very softly.
then i figured out what she said.
i was really feeling sad that time. i am there to accompany her, and going back at three because she has NP.
yet, she went to look for benson.
okay, maybe i should be understanding because she wants to be with benson whevever she can afford to.
or maybe we neglected her while playing piano.
told you, three friends is never good...
sigh.
actually, i dont mind going with you to watch them play basketball.
problem is, i dont wanna see him, i will feel sad.
sigh, be happy say lee.
i dont know la. anyway, i think daugther will want to play piano tomorrow again.
im really afraid if we go there, say lee would just head towards the basketball court.
thats it.
and i wanna wait for daughter.
Lord, please help... sigh.
and i was very afraid after listening to what mr chia said in class.
although i am a Christian, i still will respect other religions and those spirits.
i should be brave and tell myself the holy spirit is inside me, He will protect me no matter what.
Lord, please help rebecca to be brave and not be scared. likewise, my other friends too.
please bless everyone that they would not see anything that will scare them.
im alone at home now, but im trying my best to be brave.
what!! that means i cant go back at twelve plus this WHOLE MONTH??
and i dont know why the j wished andy happy birthday. nevermind, his girlfriend what.
hahaha and i realised im harbouring suicidal thoughts after reading the paper. hahaha.Labels: i will leave after i feel you can really be happy; without any doubt, your friends would be by you no matter what.