first, it was RACHEL, GET INTO THE ROOM.
next, HOW LONG DO YOU WANT ME TO WAIT.
GET INTO THE ROOM.
then the door slammed, and i hear my father's shouting.
how long does this have to carry on.
why why why, always shouting in my family life.
thus, i decided to plug in my mp4 player and listen to Aviation. like i always do.
i was telling myself, i hope my feeling for you isnt fading.
even though im hurting myself like that.
i watched finished the show on channel 8. its the seven o' clock show.
the guy grabbed the girl's hands and said, lets stop running away from this.
that went in. and i felt the urge to cry.
last few days i kept having nightmares. or dreams that would never happen.
for example, i dreamt you and i were together, plus at your house.
and i kept seeing scary faces. i dont know why.
i was so scared till i didnt dare to fall asleep.
4th august 2007. went with zimmer and friends and say lee to safra. or rather walked with them.
say lee was meeting benson. then yeah he was with his friends there.
they just walked across the road like we were strangers. nevermind.
but at 2+. he messaged and asked if i was asleep.
however, i only woke up at 4+ by the vibration.
then i replied him. then we messaged and stuff.
im fine with the way things are now. (:
at least we still can communicate like that or whatever.
say lee. she. tried on six times, for a stupid dress she fancied at pepper plus!!
haha. at least shes changing. and that is very good. (:
then. i told her about my dreams.
i was about to say, i wonder if his girlfriend stayed over at his house before.....
then say lee told me bout' it. ughhhh.
ahhhh she actually stayed over at his house before!
and its like, this tells me how close he and her are?
as in the relationship.
oh well. i then tried to perk myself up, telling myself, im okay, im fine. it doesnt bother me. im okay.
but i kept blabbering at say lee at random times, bursting out, why she stayed at his house!!??
i know i have no right to intefere. hahaha.
but. hmm.
nevermind.
and i dont know whats that hahaha for.
seriously, i dont like it la.
so, i decided not to tag at your blog. if i keep tagging, you might take things for granted right?
the phrase goes, absence makes the heart grow fonder.
we have not contacted for say, two days?
if we really can continue like this, and you really are fine, i think things will go in this way.
i suppose.
im trying to find excuses not to forget you. i dont want to.
and indeed tears welled up just now. i forced it back. i have to keep them in order to sit outside and start typing this post.
gonna catch a movie, called alone with say lee and si ling tomorrow.
not sure if si ling can make it.
ppl who know me should know i dont watch such movies.
if i do, theres a reason.
and that is, im trying to do things that i dont like. somehow im hoping doing this to myself would make me feel better.
(and the door just startled me with the slam though the things are plugged into my ears. and i have no idea what happened. i only saw mt father coming out.)
and im feeling sick these few days. dont know why either.
aha! and qi sheng has been calling me these few days. keep in touch!
i just bought a book from art box recently. i decided to have my biography. should i say, so-called. since not everythng is inside.
i dont know what i wanna do.
im feeling weird.
im feeling lost.
and zimmer packed the underneath of my table. thanks.
and sorry.
i realised zimmer's friends are funny.
and oh, v called them the three machos. hahahah.
8:10 PM
i dream of you.
♥