i have no idea if this is love.
but i know that it hurts a lot..
its very painful...
its my fault that i didnt give you a chance.
but is it my fault too, that i dont dare?
i wrote through say lee on your tagboard.
"dont think too much, choose the way that will make you happy."
i hope you can be happy and find a girl who dares and really love you a lot.
dont worry, i wont show my misery.
i will put up a brave front and show tht im happy in front of everybody.
i dont want anyone to worry for me.
thank you for everything and a big sorry...
sorry cousin that i havent spoken to you ever since you came. im really sorry.
but you gotta understand that its hard. im touched that you remebered what i told you two years ago. it actually slipped off my mind.
"wo yao kai shi an jing xia lai le."
im surprised you actually remember.
after all that has happened, i have fell countless times but i have too, learnt i dont wish to speak to you because im afraid when you return to Malaysia i will be very sad.
i know that i will miss you when you leave.
so this is my method of preventing myself from getting hurt.
my sister told me you told her you're very sad and hurt that i keep ignoring you.
you all gotta know.
not that i dont want
is that i really dont dare.
im sorry!
sigh.
i admit that im weak and useless
but i really have no idea when i really can be strong.
sorry to my friends for my lousy mood and not being myself...
ahh!
its driving me nuts.
i cant concentrate on my studies.
God... please help me! ):
sigh. why am i writing all these shit
11:22 PM
i dream of you.
♥